I am not going gently into that good night. Getting older just pisses me off. So mostly, I just ignore it.I know there is no turning back. That is a foolish fantasy, but I’m having trouble “accepting” what it really means.
Case in point: Exactly a month ago, I sprained my left knee. It still hurts. Once I’m up and either sitting or standing, it starts to swell, and so does my ankle. Lesson One: you don’t heal as well or as fast.
I should go back to the doctor, but what for? It will mean an MRI or CT scan that I can’t afford (even though I have insurance which will pay for most of either.) So then you start to do that weighing thing: on one hand…and on the other hand…So, do I want to do this (no) or do I want to have trouble walking forever (no). Great choice. No versus no.
I don’t want to take any more medications. I take two for high blood pressure already (take the pills, or have a stroke). Okay…that was easy. I take one, once a week, for osteoporosis, and that REALLY pisses me off. Why do I have osteoporosis? For one thing, I am the queen of dairy, not to be confused with the restaurant of the same name. I drink milk with every meal. I eat ice cream and cheese like it was going out of style. But…that’s only since I was 17, when it was probably too late. And I seem to have some problem absorbing Vitamin D, which is critical to your ability to absorb calcium. Plus, I had radiation therapy, which leaches calcium.
So what are you gonna do? Answer: take the drug.
What I would like is the magical nystery pill. Not one that promises to make me younger, but one that makes me happier about getting older. Or smaller or larger.